


The Start of a Want

by Archer2016



Series: IronHawk (Tony Stark/ Clint Barton) [2]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Caring Natasha Romanov, Clint Barton Feels, Confused Tony Stark, Deaf Clint Barton, Falling In Love, M/M, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Scared Clint, Slow Build, Tony Stark Has A Heart, light smut at the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 10:05:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19461733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Archer2016/pseuds/Archer2016
Summary: A prequel to the book before, I guess they could be read without reading the other books.





	The Start of a Want

Clint was this, lovely disaster human.  
Tony knew that very well.  
The man was capable of many things while in mission mode, but when he was at home and all relaxed, or as relaxed as a man like Clint can be, he was all unscrambled, a disaster waiting to happen.  
It was amazing how the man could get back up and jump back in the fight after being knocked down all those times. Tony was sure Clint has all medical procedures memorised because of how many times he had needed them.  
He was sure there wasn’t a bone in that man’s body that hadn’t been fractured or broke, not a patch of skin that didn’t hold a bruise or a cut. Clint just always had bandages wrapped around some part of his body or a band aid covering cuts on his body as well.  
Tony never cared to know about the archer much before, and it was weird that he was starting to. He knew the archer was inclined to always be present around the team but quiet and silent, so it was a little weird to know how chatty the archer really was when given the chance to talk. He wanted to know more things about the shorter blonde man.  
It’s hard to pinpoint when his little interest in the team’s resident archer started, but he knew that that interest had grown and developed into this want that scared him shitless. He started noticing all the little things the guy would do and note them, he’d get this stupid grin at the thought of them, and he’d wonder when those little things had started and developed into being habit.  
It was getting frustrating and he’d been resorting to his usual habit of locking himself in his lab and working for long ass hours, depending on caffeine to fill him with some energy to stay awake. The team weren’t happy with it but as hard as they tried he ignored them and continued inventing as a way to get his mind off an adorable archer just a few floors above him, probably perched on the counter and working on his arrows. He shook his head and went to work on improving the repulsors on his iron gauntlet.  
It was working, and with Bruce coming down to help him with the things he was too tired to think of, he was working fast and was almost done on his fifth invention in the past two months. He felt relaxed, he felt as though he can take a lungful of air without sighing it out over the thought of a certain someone. Maybe, maybe he can go back to watching porn and not wish he could have the blonde naked and in his bed.  
But later on, the stash of caffeine in his lab had been all used up and he needed to go get more. He had been so tired, he didn’t check the time nor think of who would be upstairs in the communal kitchen. His eyes were barely open, his feet were dragging themselves forward, his shoulders drooped, and a yawn slipping past chapped, bitten red and raw lips every few seconds. It was twelve in the morning, everyone was awake and buzzing about somewhere across New York. But just to his luck, their resident archer had just woken up.  
Tony reached the kitchen to see him sitting on the countertop, his feet tucked under himself in a criss cross position, and his hands pulled close to his chest and holding a hot pot of coffee. His eyes were half lidded and blue-grey eyes were focused on the mouth of the pot in his hands, his blonde hair dishevelled and poking up at the sides, his cheeks were flushed pink against skin that looked paler than usual, and his lips were a scary colour of blue. He stopped in place, eyes a little wider as he saw Clint’s clothes, which were a purple hoodie and tight black pants paired with white socks, were soaking wet. He spotted two white band aids, one on his nose and another on the left side of his forehead, but he was sure there were more.  
It looked to the engineer that the archer didn’t know about his state, or maybe he just didn’t care. In a way, he could relate.  
He approached the man with a worried expression and when he stopped by him, Clint lifted his head and met his eyes. Blue-grey eyes stared back with no emotions and it was a little scary at first but then the archer scoffed and made an annoyed face.  
“There’s no need to worry ‘bout me, Stark. M’fine and I don’t need the care,” his voice was levelled and as if he wasn’t freezing half to death. Of course, Tony wasn’t surprised that he Clint wasn’t shivering or showing anything but stubbornness. SHEILD really knew how to train its agents.  
Clint continued drinking his coffee, unfazed. “Did you at least pass by medical?” Tony asked and the archer stopped his drink to look up again from his pot. He arched a questioning brow at the man standing in front of him.  
“Coffee was more important,” he deadpanned but he had a curious gaze in those mesmerising eyes. His brows creased and he tilted his head slightly.  
“Clint, you have to take care of yourself more,” Tony sighed and pinched the brink of his nose, and because he closed his eyes he didn’t see Clint’s eyes growing wide and giving him an incredulous look.  
“Says the guy who’s ‘bout to pass out,” Clint countered and chugged some more coffee. Tony groaned as an answer and lifted his head as he rubbed his eyes. “When did you start to care ‘bout me, Stark?” And Tony froze.  
He blinked a bit and thought of the question because shit man, how can he tell Clint that he cares for him more than a friend should? He felt nervous and fidgety under Clint’s curious gaze. He met those eyes and all thoughts and words fled from his head. He was speechless. He had nothing to say. Tony Stark had nothing to say.  
“Tony?” Clint asked and Tony was struck by the thought that Clint had called him by his first name and god did he like the way his name rolled off of Clint’s tongue.  
Tony poked his tongue out and licked his lips nervously but answered, “As team leader it is my job to make sure that every person in my team is healthy and taken care of. So really, it’s my job,” he regretted saying that it was his job to care as if that was just it, a job he had to do and not wanted to, but damn it if he wasn’t prideful to stick to his words and admit that is exactly what he meant to say. And for a flash of a second he saw the man’s face change from disappointment to hurt to understanding.  
The archer pulled his upper lip between his teeth and nodded his head. He chugged the rest of his drink and then set it aside. He avoided Tony’s eyes as he jumped off the countertop and started to walk away from him. Tony stared after him, his tired mind taking in the view of Clint’s shirt sticking to his back and his pants sticking to his ass and legs, and god the shoulders on that guy, and his mouth drying up. He didn’t notice himself ogling Clint’s ass until the man stopped in place and turned around to him.  
Imagine the sight of him, standing with his shoulders hunched forward, his lips in a firm frown, his tired eyes wide and full of adoration, and god Clint was sure to notice that he was ogling that round, tight ass.  
“Don’t worry, I’m gonna make your job easier and go to medical for a check-up,” the blonde said, and there was something hidden in his voice that Tony just couldn’t pinpoint. It sounded a little like annoyed as well as… as sadness? Clint was in the elevator and out of sight when Tony came back to earth and wanted to correct his earlier statement, god, to tell him exactly that he cared about Clint because he wanted to. He sagged when he knew he drove Clint away. Maybe buying him a giant teddy bear would make things better between them. Yeah, that’s what he’ll do.  
Tony was quick to go online and order a human sized, purple teddy bear that has a shirt with the words ‘I love arrows’ on it. He made sure it was extra fluffy and fuzzy. He paired the teddy bear with some chocolates and bought him three boxes of pizza. He knew how much Clint loved pizza, knew it was practically the only food the guy ate other than coffee too. Geez, he needed to get over this crush thing or he’ll start making things awkward between Clint and him.  
He didn’t stick around to see Clint’s reaction to the gifts when he came back from medical because he had cowardly ran to the lab and locked himself in there again. He’d get Bruce to get him some coffee and if Bruce didn’t, there was the good captain with his good morals to get him some. He missed the shocked look on Clint’s face and the soft smile that painted his face for the majority of his day.  
All the nights he spent cooped up in his lab and running on caffeine were catching up to him in battle and it sucked. Even if he was in his armour and he could ask Jarvis to autopilot, his stubborn pride could never allow himself to let the suit act and save the world, no, that was Tony Stark’s job. He was the hero, not the suit.  
Though the two missions they had done he was able to get by without getting killed or killing anyone they hadn’t been easy with Tony so off his game and not being able to slip into his usual careful mind set as team leader. He was a loose cannon and was so close to ruining the whole mission and endangering everyone.  
Tony had been so embarrassed when he was grabbed by the killed robot sent by some newbie villain to destroy New York and thrown across the street. How had he missed the stupid metal hands god damn it? And even more when he flew at him, enraged, his sight blurred and didn’t notice the missile that was shot right at him, about to hit him head first, until it exploded in his face and threw him back down to the street. He learned later that it was Clint that had shot the arrow that detonated the bomb and stopped it from hitting him. Luckily for him, it had been farther away from him but it had done a number on his suit. God, now he needed to reinforce the suit.  
Steve had been furious, Natasha had been scaring him with her death glare, and Bruce had been disappointed and frowny. Clint hadn’t bothered to face him with anything that told him what he thought of his performance on the field, in a way that was a relief. He wasn’t sure he could handle the disappointed or mad faces Clint would’ve made at him.  
But, later on when he was bullied into his room by Pepper and Bruce, yes even Bruce, somebody knocked on his door. He had been lying in his bed spread eagle and staring at the ceiling as guilt ate away at his thoughts and ruining any chances he had of sleep. He had been tempted to ignore whoever it was that knocked on his door but decided company would be better than sitting down with his thoughts.  
Clint stood on the other side of the door when he opened it. The archer had looked adorable as he nervously shifted and gave him a shy smile at first, avoiding eye contact at first. It had Tony confused but he greeted the man and the man greeted him back.  
“You do realise its dark O’clock midnight, right?” Tony’s voice came out tired and flat and it almost made Tony laugh at the irony. The archer nodded his head and sighed.  
“Yeah, I know,” he let out a breath again, “I just, figured that you wouldn’t be sleeping yet and wanted to come check up on you. See how you’re doing,” Tony’s brows furrowed a bit.  
“I’m, um, I’m fine I guess. Yeah, you’re right, I wasn’t sleeping. Really haven’t been able to,” it scared Tony how he was just telling these things when to other people, even Pepper, he would never admit that he’s been having trouble.  
“I’ve figured. You know, as team leader you as well need to be healthy and well taken care of, right?” Clint said, “We need you Tony, please take care of yourself,” the archer gave him a warm smile and Tony felt his heart stutter. Shit. He smiled back at Clint, not knowing exactly what to say back.  
“I’ll… I’ll-yeah, I-yeah,” He stuttered. God, he really didn’t know what to say at all to this. It was an awkward minute that passed by before Tony decided to ask Clint if he wanted to come inside. The archer nodded and answered with a laugh that he as well wasn’t able to sleep.  
They spent the night on the couch in Tony’s bedroom watching whatever random thing they decided to stop on. Tony pulled out some drinks and some bags of chips then ordered pizza and Clint, the beautiful man, was beaming and telling him about how Natasha was going to kill him because she banned him from having pizza for a week.  
“Wait, so am I dragged into this? Am I going to have to worry about a crazy red head stabbing me when I least expect it in the morning?” Tony only half joked, he was pretty sure Natasha would do that. It made Clint laugh loudly, shoulders shaking and eyes crinkling. “Don’t worry ‘bout her, I’ll make sure to tell her I bribed you,” Clint’s grin was genuine, and Tony was almost sure that this trained spy was relaxed and genuine with him.  
“So you’re going to tell her,” Tony worried a bit. Clint shook his head. “She’ll figure it out somehow. Natasha is really scary man, she always knows when people are keeping something from her and she always finds out what and how. I really don’t know how,”  
“Hey, you used me,”  
“For pizza I’ll use anyone,”  
Tony laughed and Clint beamed, taking a bite of the pizza in his hand. He met Tony’s eyes.  
“But, there was also this nice bonus of getting to hang out with our fearless leader,” Clint blurted and turned his head to avoid the soft look in his leader’s eyes. The smile practically plastered itself across its self across his face and refused to leave. He felt heat going up his neck but continued to stare at the blonde sitting by him. He wanted this to never end. He was having so much fun and didn’t want it to end early.  
“I’m flattered, Barton. It was really nice to sit down and hang out. Want to do it again? This would be nice, like a routine thing. Every end of the week or something like that,” Tony hoped a bit. He wanted to have been smoother about this, he wanted to be the flirt he was known to be, but no, with Clint he lost all thoughts and usual acts. He wanted to impress Clint, wanted to show him that he was genuine about wanting to spend more time with the archer that he can’t seem to keep off his mind.  
The archer’s head snapped to him and he looked surprised and shocked. “Yeah, I’d like that,” the shock melted into his usual cocky smiling face, all boyish, all daring, and all just lightening his youth.  
And as he closed the door when Clint left, he felt as if a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. It felt easier to breathe now that he was accepting that yeah he was attracted to this man and there was nothing he could do other than try to get the archer to like him back. Content he was able to sleep, forgetting the guilt of his ill performance these past days.  
Steve had taken it upon himself to grab Tony by the arm and drag him to their meeting room and council him over his behaviour and as a friend ask about his wellbeing and if there was a problem he could help with. God, the questions were asked cautiously and with genuine concern and worry the guilt was starting to resurface.  
He found himself closing up to the man and waving it aside as nightmares because really there was no way to deal with nightmares or anything a person could do to stop them from happening. He promised Cap that that was it and even if the Captain wasn’t sure that was the actual problem he didn’t push it and clamped a hand on his friend’s shoulder reminding him the team was here to help him if he ever needed it.  
It was hard getting used to the team, and it was even harder to get used to them each showing him they cared in their own special way. He was always looked like he was hit with a brick wall when he was reminded that his team had his back for no other purpose than because they truly care. Every one of them had their hardships, mostly Natasha, but they didn’t judge one another for it and tried not to overstep the others’ comfort zones.  
He was at his best during the next mission and noticed how everyone took care of the other. The archer on the roof eliminating anything he considered a threat about to happen to his teammates. The spy was always quick to eliminate her enemy and rush to eliminate one’s trying to jump up behind the others. The Hulk was always careful of his teammates as he smashed the robots, eyes glancing from time to time to Iron Man or Hawkeye because they weren’t in his line of view on the ground. The Captain usually is too cooped up with the masses around him and attacked with everything he could, and threw the shield at ones attempting to jump at his teammates and continued with his fists before the shield would come back to him. He decided he would try to do more and help the team as well.  
“Guys, I need help,” came Clint’s ragged and panicked breathing through the comm. Tony almost faltered when he heard the underlying fear he was learning to identify slowly. Every fibre of his being screamed at him to abandon everything and rush to Clint but he rationalised and stood his ground against the robots attacking their city. It was the same villain that built that damn robot that threw him across the city when he was distracted and so very tired. Turns out almost killing Iron Man had encouraged him to make more of those robots and try again. This time Tony was awake, at full power, and so ready to destroy that confidence the villain had built up.  
“Calm down, birdie, what’s going on?” He tried the command to ground him. He heard an explosion and he almost flinched. “I’m trapped, I can’t move at all. I-I-can’t feel my arms or see anything, Tasha, I can’t see anything at all,” Tony pushed down the little jealousy brewing that Clint was seeking Natasha to comfort him but he understood that he needed her, it was so easy to call for the people we love when in pain or scared.  
Clint’s biggest fear was going blind. It was known by the whole team. He hadn’t shared it with anyone. He was blinded one time by an enemy for some time and couldn’t stop shaking and screaming until he was sedated by Natasha. Then she explained that Clint feared going blind because he thought he’d be useless without being able to see. The man was already deaf, it wasn’t quite a hindrance but it still sucked, and why would the world be so cruel to take Clint’s eyesight and take away the one thing Clint found comfort in doing.  
Natasha was quick to start talking over the comm. She was talking in Russian, her voice sounded stern and Tony wasn’t sure how that could calm Clint down but he guessed there was something in that tone that both spies learned to hide and only the other could figure out what it was.  
“Where are you, Clint?” Tony asked only to be yelled at by Natasha.  
“Shut up Stark, let me talk to him,” she hissed over the comm.  
He waited for her as he smashed through more robots. He was sure the guy had at least four dozen robots. They were all falling quickly but it still took some hell of a time to defeat them all and Tony was getting impatient.  
Natasha told Tony his location and the man all but blasted towards his friend. He found a robot lying down on its back, all lighting that said it was online was diminished telling him it was dead, but the building under it was destroyed and reduced to rubble. It was going take a hell of a lot to rebuild this, and this building wasn’t even finished being built yet.  
Clint was under there somewhere.  
“Jarvis, scan for any heat signatures,” Tony ordered and flew down close to the destroyed building. The crushed bricks, metal, and cements of the building were in one large pile where the building once was, under the robot, and onto the streets by it. Dust was still in the air, slowly fading away to clear the sight in front of him.  
“Sir, the major heat signature is the large robot. But I’m picking up a smaller one,” Jarvis informed his creator and then led Tony there. Iron Man was following Jarvis’s directions and clearing through the rubble in search of his teammate. He was quick and efficient. He picked up one large piece that wasn’t reduced to broken bits and laying on a few of unbroken beams, and threw it aside. The light flooded and showed a really small room.  
He found Hawkeye trembling, sitting up as much as he could with a pillar laying over his right arm, thankfully not over his head. The archer had his legs pulled up to his chest. His forehead was cut, his lips were split, and his left arm was bleeding from multiple places. He was bruised up as well. His skin was white from the dust the rubble must have caused and stuck to his skin cause of sweat. Iron Man flew down. He was careful not to land and use his weight to break the floor under him and causing it to break.  
Clint’s fear filled and panicked eyes looked up to look at Tony’s metal face plating. Tony could see they were wet and he was so close to tears, it made his heart tighten in his chest. Why hadn’t anyone noticed this was happening? Why hadn’t they seen that a robot was falling onto the building Clint was on?  
“Hey Clint, you’re fine now, see? You can see,” Tony tried to soothe him as he slowly bent down towards him. Clint shook his head slightly but didn’t move away from Tony. Metal arms encircled his body, the metal armour knelt by his side and trying to pull him close. The floor thankfully didn’t give away underneath their joined weight. Tony blasted the pillar off of Clint’s arm and pulled the archer completely into his arms. Clint moved shaky arms around Tony’s armour and shoved his head to the metal chest. Tony felt guilty that he wanted to be out of his armour and feel Clint’s warm body against his flesh and bone chest, his strong arms around his bare neck. He blasted up and saw the team had finished up.  
“Thank you, Tony,” Clint’s voice was small and shaky but it was genuine and Tony just gave in to the fluttering his heart seemed to do every time Clint said something to him. He flew Clint to the tower knowing Clint would refuse going to any hospital or SHEILD medical.  
Clint sagged on his shoulder, his adrenaline calming down now that he knew he was safe, giving into the tiredness that was finally settling into his bones. His eyes were drooping and his grip was getting looser even as he tried to keep himself awake, it was an obvious losing battle. When Tony had reached Clint’s room he found the blonde archer sleeping soundly. His heart was beating quickly in his chest at the adorable sight of the archer at peace, even with the deep frown in his forehead. Tony was giving into this crush, letting settle deep inside his chest, and accepting it. He found it easier. Found himself relaxed with the fact that he’s okay with this. He’ll try again, try and start something with Clint and see where it’ll lead.  
He tended to wounds as best as he knew and when Bruce came he took over with Natasha as an assistant. He was pushed out of the room but he didn’t fight it. He just waited, he worried, but he was calm.  
Two weeks later, it was in the morning, like seven a.m. and Tony wasn’t able to sleep. He was in his bathrobe lying on his bed. He was smiling up at the ceiling, thinking of Clint sitting by him, that beautiful body leaning against him. He wanted the normal things with Clint. He wanted to sleep by him and wake up with him. He wanted to be able to hold his hand. He wanted to be able to kiss him softly and rub his cheek. He wanted to be able to understand him the way Natasha was able to, okay, maybe not as much as Natasha but he wanted to get to know all the archer’s expressions and every little thing that makes him happy.  
His grin was widening as he thought of Clint trusting him enough to take off his clothes in front of him, show him every scar, every blemish, every freckle. He’ll be trying his best to make sure he loves the archer the way he deserves to be loved.  
Feeling safe enough, Tony opened his robe and pulled down his underwear. He grabbed himself and moaned loudly. He was so hard. He felt the rush of blood through him migrating south and gasped. He imagined Clint’s strong hand sitting between his thighs, looking at him with that heavy hawk gaze of his, grinning that cocky and daring grin as he swiped his hand over the tip of his cock. He groaned loudly, “Fuck, Clint,” he gasped, tongue slicking his lips as he thought of red lips, split open and enveloping him, a blonde head bobbing up and down as blue-grey eyes met his gaze and locked on his.  
His room walls were thick enough, nobody outside would hear him.  
“Clint,” he moaned loud and wantonly as the door to his bedroom opened, causing man he was masturbating to freeze in the doorway.


End file.
